Oct 292015

FANTASYISLAND1I’ve put a fair few things in my butt, but up until I received this product I hadn’t used anal beads. I always chose plugs over beads because I thought they were more my jam, and to be honest they are, but anal beads definitely won’t be something I ignore from now on.

The Fantasy Island Black Currant Anal Beads are silicone anal beads with light screw-thread texture on them. They’re a fairly daunting 11 inches insertable length with a maximum circumference of 5.5″, so they’re not small, and I wouldn’t recommend them for anal beginners. I was worried about the length as I’m not accustomed to deep anal play. I can take toys that are 7″ with glee, but I’ve never had anything inserted that was longer than the length of my rectum. Basically, I was scared about how the beads going around the kink from rectum to colon would go.

The first try was… Different. Getting the beads inserted takes some practice because they’re long and flexible; you’re better off putting lots of lube on the first couple beads before insertion and letting the lube that gets left on your entrance slick the rest of the beads up, only applying more if you need it, on the beads you need it on. Lubing up the entire set just leads to lube getting everywhere and some otherwise simple anal play turning into a slippery, slightly frustrating mess. Continue reading »

 Posted by at 4:16 pm
Jun 272015

OXBALLS BOSS SLIDER PLUGOxballs specializes in toys targeted toward gay men. I however also have holes that like things inside of them, and so I reached out to Oxballs to see if they had any toys I could review. When the package arrived, I was somewhat surprised to see that I’d been sent two mediums and a large. Oxballs is a lot like fantasy toy companies, where the sizing mostly bounces between big and really fucking huge. My ass was totally terrified of the size of the toys I’d received, but rather than emailing them and telling them that the toys would never fit in my ass, I took it as a challenge.

And that’s the story of how I learnt to take 7″+ circumference toys in my ass. With a lot of prep, determination, pure stubbornness, and a whole fucktonne of lube.

The Boss is 4 inches in insertable length. Around the coronal ridge the largest it gets is 6.9 inches, and the maximum overall circumference is around the shaft where it maxes out at 7.3 inches.

Before I could even attempt to get the Boss Slider in my ass, I had to purchase some other smoothly tapered plugs, as I had no toys that would allow me to work up to it well. So while I was waiting for those to arrive, I tried it in my other, more acclimatized hole. Continue reading »

 Posted by at 7:18 pm
Jun 192015

Frisky Bad Kitty Cat Tail Butt PlugThe Frisky Bad Kitty Cat Tail Butt Plug is a silicone anal plug with a bendable, not-overly-fluffy cats tail. A lot of tail butt plugs on the market are very fluffy, and as much as I’m a fan of fluffy tails on real cats, my personal preference for my own tail is that of a more streamlined appearance.

It comes in black, which works fine for me, but if you’re after something that matches your personality, you don’t have other options. The silicone is relatively silky to touch, and has a slight amount of give to it. Its 4 inches insertable with a maximum circumference of 4.6″.

The plug is what I would consider small, and I think most people, even beginners, would be able to manage it just fine. It’s not tiny girth wise, but the taper eases insertion; so even if you are a beginner butt adventurer, with some quality water-based lube, it should be totally doable.

I was a little worried that the weight of the tail would pull on the plug, and rip it from my ass when I was wearing it, but I don’t feel that at all. Continue reading »

 Posted by at 9:20 pm
Apr 122015

IMG_4337If you remember anything about me, I want it to be that I’m the first recipient of a Hole Punch Toys toy Down Under. The first person to put an Ass Cram Cone down under, in Down Under.

The Ass Cram Cone is a gorgeous, not-so-little butt toy, handmade in Minnesota by Hole Punch Toys. It’s a buttplug shaped like a swirl of soft-serve and coloured like Neapolitan ice cream, complete with drips. It’s cute, hilarious and perfect.

My favourite thing about Hole Punch toys is that they’re fun, and I’m a sucker for puns. Their site is well worth a look if you love interesting and humorous toys.

The Ass Cram Cone is a fairly large plug. Its maximum circumference is 6.4 inches and has an insertable length of around 4.5 inches. It’s definitely the thickest thing I’ve had up my ass thus far. Thanks to the taper of the tip on the Ass Cram, it was actually a lot easier to conquer than I imagined. It still took a lot of lube, warm-up and determination, but I did get it in, despite it being significantly larger than my biggest plug which is 1.5″ diameter.

Because it’s so large, it’s offered in both soft and stiff firmness. I got mine in stiff as I know I enjoy harder toys. This is my first Hole Punch toy, and I don’t know how soft their soft is, so stiff seemed like the best option for me. I’d rather something be too hard than too soft.

They’re not kidding when they say it’s stiff. It’s hard, harder than Tantus toys, and has no discernible give in the body.

When inserted I can feel it, and clenching around it is really nice. It very much pushes my limits and if it were any bigger it wouldn’t fit. This is great; it stretches and fills me, and turns out I enjoy that as much anally as I do vaginally. Although it leads to some issues too. Continue reading »

 Posted by at 8:02 pm
Feb 122015




tantus twist plug

Ok, now that’s out of my system, to the review!

I like to stick things in my ass. More specifically, I like to stick butt plugs in my ass and then stick other things in my vagina. The combination of having my ass filled while something stimulates my G-spot, is quite frankly, amazing. All of my nerves are stimulated and it brings me to a really satisfying, explosive orgasm.

When JOUJOU asked me if I wanted to review some Tantus toys, I said yes, because Tantus is amazing. They make wonderful toys from platinum cure silicone. All their toys are body-safe and completely sterilisable by bleaching or boiling. JOUJOU sent me both the Tantus Adam 02 dildo and the Twist in exchange for my review.

I chose the Twist because my butt loves texture. Whether vaginally or anally my body prefers at least some sort of texture, otherwise I’m left bored and completely underwhelmed. Even a light wave in the shaft is better than nothing. The Tantus Twist is the most highly textured anal plug I’ve come across.

As Beyoncé says, if you like it then you should put a ring on it, and that’s exactly what I intended to do. Continue reading »

 Posted by at 1:20 am
Nov 132014

I still get nervous about this toy. It’s not big or intimidating at all, it’s the first anal toy I ever bought for just that reason. This toy makes me nervous because, although being marketed as a plug, it should very much not be used as a plug. The ring that is supposed to be the base, y’know, the flared base that stops it from slipping up your ass? Well, it’s flexible. And turns out, whilst in the throes of awesome Skype sex with a buttplug in your booty and fucking yourself vigorously with a dildo, there’s a very real risk of it getting… Misplaced.

This toy should only be used when you’re with a partner. A partner who has their finger through the ring. Or if you plan to keep your finger through it constantly. I mean, it says it right in the name. One-Finger. One finger through the ring at all times. Trust me. Don’t remove the finger. Don’t remove the finger and be cajoled into believing your ass won’t suck that thing up the first chance it gets. Because it will. Trust me on this.

pipedream one finger anal plug

It was probably the second time that I used this plug. I was still new to anal play but learnt very quickly I really very much like things in my butt. I knew that flared bases were important, but I thought the ring would be enough. I didn’t understand the true force of my arsehole to absorb things. The flexible ring was no match for my ass. As I said, I was on Skype, fucking myself. I felt the ring pinching a little bit. At that time, I didn’t realize the pinching was from the ring pulling weird on my butthole, I just thought the plug was a little uncomfortable. I continued, paying no attention to it and, soon enough, the pinching went away. We finished jacking off and I went to shower. I like to shower after anal play in case of poop when the plug is removed. I got in the shower, high on post-orgasm goodness. I went to pull the plug out. Continue reading »

 Posted by at 2:10 am